Tag: ego dissolution

The Collapse of Illusion

Navigating the Aftermath of Awakening

Reality fractures in a single instant, revealing itself as something altogether ungraspable. The moment of absolute recognition—the unfiltered, direct encounter with Truth—tears through the mind like a bolt of cosmic lightning, leaving no belief unshaken, no identity intact. The self, as it was once understood, dissolves into the vastness, leaving behind nothing but raw awareness.

A revelation of such magnitude is both exhilarating and devastating. The world remains as it was, yet nothing remains the same. The return to ordinary existence feels disjointed, as if waking from a dream only to realize the dream is what was once called life. Conversations that once held meaning now seem hollow, ambitions that once fueled passion now appear weightless. The social frameworks that once dictated identity—the career, the friendships, the personal convictions—suddenly feel like distant echoes of a forgotten language.

A solitude arises, not necessarily by choice, but as an inevitable consequence of perceiving beyond the familiar constructs. People speak, but the words seem veiled in a fog of assumptions and conditioned perspectives. What was once music now carries an indescribable depth, revealing textures previously unnoticed. Colours take on a vibrancy beyond sight, whispering truths beyond language. The ordinary world hums with a resonance that cannot be explained, only felt.

Attempting to articulate the experience proves futile. Language stumbles over itself, unable to capture the unspeakable. Those who listen often respond with polite nods, skepticism, or outright dismissal. A few may lean in with genuine curiosity, yet without direct experience, understanding remains confined to intellectualization. Words, at best, become poetic approximations, metaphors stretching toward something that cannot be contained within the mind.

This is the paradox of awakening. The very moment that reveals the boundless unity of existence also exposes the fragmented nature of human perception. The mind wants to categorize, to make sense, to translate the infinite into the finite. But Truth is not something to be grasped; it is something to be surrendered into.

Isolation does not come from arrogance, nor from a desire to detach, but from the realization that much of what once passed as reality was a mirage. The process of reintegration is neither smooth nor predictable. There is grief in letting go of the known, yet immense freedom in no longer being bound by it. What remains is a quiet certainty—an understanding that cannot be proven, only lived.

This path is not for the faint-hearted. It is not about enlightenment as an achievement or an identity. It is about dissolution. It is about dying before death. And in that dissolution, what remains is the eternal presence, the silent witness, the infinite unfolding of what has always been.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation/Neurofeedback, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Day Everything Dissolved

A Journey into Absolute Oneness

A single moment can shatter every belief held about existence, leaving behind a clarity that words struggle to contain. After many years of deep meditation, everything I had been searching for revealed itself—not as a concept, not as an experience, but as the undeniable reality of being.

The shift arrived without warning. Reality no longer appeared as separate fragments; it was a single, indivisible whole. Every notion of self, identity, or distinction between observer and observed vanished. It wasn’t an intellectual realization—it was direct, immediate, and irreversible.

A profound sense of unity pervaded every fiber of existence. The universe was not something outside of me, nor was I an entity moving through it. The universe was expressing itself through me, as me, and through everything else in an infinite, harmonious unfolding.

A rush of energy surged through my being. Every cell seemed to bloom with an indescribable vitality. It was as if the boundaries of my body had dissolved, and awareness had become the vast, boundless expanse that held all things. Love was not an emotion—it was the very substance of existence, pouring through every breath, every movement, every atom.

Time lost its meaning. There was no past to remember, no future to anticipate—just an eternal presence in which all things unfolded simultaneously. Life and death were no longer opposites but part of the same undivided continuum, endlessly appearing and dissolving in a cosmic rhythm.

The mind struggled to grasp what the heart understood effortlessly. Every belief about individuality, separation, and limitation had been undone in a single instant. The concept of surrender took on an entirely new meaning. There was nothing left to resist—only the freefall into the effortless flow of existence.

Moments stretched into days, weeks, and months, each revealing deeper layers of this unfolding. The heart expanded into a depth of compassion that embraced everything—human struggle, cosmic intelligence, the raw beauty of impermanence. Gratitude arose not as a practice but as the natural expression of this vast interconnectedness.

Even now, words barely graze the surface of what transpired. To speak of it is to fragment it, to reduce the ineffable into language. Yet, something within compels the sharing, not as an attempt to explain, but as an invitation—an open door to those who sense that beyond all concepts, beyond all seeking, something boundless is already present, waiting to be remembered.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation/Neurofeedback, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

Where Shadows and Light Embrace

Where Shadows and Light Embrace

(This is based on my peak experiences between 2008 and 2010.)

There is a place beyond division, where opposites are no longer adversaries but reflections of a greater whole. Here, light does not conquer darkness, nor does darkness obscure light—they move as one, dissolving the illusion of separation.

The burdens of material existence, once heavy with expectation and illusion, no longer bind me. The false self, shaped by desire and attachment, was a fleeting shadow—one I have stepped beyond. What once felt like chains were merely unexamined beliefs, crumbling like dust in the presence of truth.

Freed from the illusions that distorted my sight, I now witness the world in its unfiltered radiance. This reality, stripped of falsehoods, does not hide behind fleeting impressions or conditioned interpretations. Everything reveals itself as it is—whole, raw, unmasked.

Liberation is not an escape but an arrival. I walk through the threshold of paradise, not as a departing soul but as one fully present. Each step on this earth, this living being we call Gaia, leaves an imprint—an offering of awareness, an echo of presence. Heaven is not a distant realm but the seamless unity of what has always been.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation/Neurofeedback, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

Beyond the Threshold

States of Transformation on the Path of Awakening

The unfolding of higher consciousness reshapes the body, mind, and nervous system, refining perception and dissolving boundaries between the self and the infinite. As the life force energy surges, a reconfiguration takes place, leading to extraordinary states that may arise temporarily or settle into permanence after a complete awakening. These moments defy conventional understanding, serving as glimpses into the profound mystery of existence.

Absolute Awareness
A sudden, all-encompassing knowing—everything perceived is an extension of consciousness itself. The senses, once thought to receive reality, are revealed as projections of an inner vastness. Nothing exists outside of the perceiver. Time, space, and form collapse into a singular presence that was never born and can never end.

The Unraveling of Sanity
Laughter, tears, trembling—an ecstatic unraveling of everything once held as truth. The self that once navigated life no longer exists in the same way. This is not a loss, but a liberation, as the mind lets go of itself and drowns joyfully in the great unknown. To those outside, it may appear like madness; to the one immersed, it is homecoming.

The Cosmic Joke
The grand illusion reveals itself, and the paradox of existence becomes clear. Everything has been a divine play, yet no one is playing it. The silent knowing of this truth ignites an unspeakable humour, a comedy with no punchline, because there is no separate audience to hear it.

The Laughter That Shakes the Cosmos
A tide of unstoppable joy rises, overwhelming the body in waves of convulsing mirth. Each breath dissolves into peals of laughter so deep that the one laughing vanishes into the act itself. There is no subject, no object, just an uproarious dance between existence and itself.

The Longing for Home
A sorrow unlike any other, not born from loss, but from remembering. A weeping that reaches into the depths of the heart, longing for a paradise never truly left. This yearning dissolves into a revelation—home was never elsewhere, only veiled by illusion.

The Weight of the World
Empathy takes on an unthinkable depth. The suffering of others is no longer outside; it is felt as one’s own. This burden does not cripple, but refines the heart, stretching it to hold an infinite compassion, mirroring the silent grace of the cosmos.

The Abyss of Emptiness
A state beyond experience itself. No memory of it remains upon return, yet its imprint lingers—a knowing beyond knowledge. This is not the absence of self, but the absence of absence itself. The full void, the fullness that is void.

The Unspeakable Union
A rapture that has nothing to do with flesh, yet shakes every fiber of being. The merging of the personal with the eternal, where boundaries dissolve into waves of ecstasy. A communion beyond body, mind, or name—pure, unfiltered essence meeting itself.

The Sacred Intoxication
Drunk on something that cannot be named, yet utterly lucid. A divine inebriation, as if the nectar of existence itself has been consumed. Every cell vibrates in bliss, yet the mind remains clear, witnessing the unfolding without resistance.

The Euphoric Ascension
A high without substance, a flight without wings. The sensation of rising beyond the known, as if an unseen force is lifting every molecule into a radiant expanse. A state that no external catalyst could ever induce.

The Bliss That Has No Opposite
A radiance so complete, so uncontainable, that nothing remains but the luminous hum of existence itself. Not happiness, not pleasure—something far beyond. The body, no longer just flesh, becomes light, becomes rhythm, becomes the very breath of creation. This is not an experience, but the dissolution into what has always been.

Every moment on this path is a fleeting ripple in the ocean of awareness. These states arise, and they pass. Holding onto them is to miss the invitation they offer. There is something beyond them, something untouched by all forms and fluctuations. No words can describe it. No mind can grasp it. Yet, it has never been apart from you. This is the silent truth, whispering between every heartbeat. The kingdom is not coming. It has always been here.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation/Neurofeedback, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Awakening That Shatters Illusions

The kind of awakening spoken of in hushed tones is not the polished enlightenment paraded as a spiritual accomplishment. It is not the gentle illumination that leaves one basking in self-satisfaction. This awakening will chase any so-called enlightened being back into the cave of the darkest shade of the blissfully ignorant.

There is a threshold beyond which the comfort of spiritual attainments dissolves, where the foundation of all presumed knowledge crumbles. Many claim to walk this path, but few have stepped beyond the point of no return. The self is torn open, and what is left is neither the seeker nor the sought. Any trace of identity vanishes like smoke swallowed by the wind.

Silence remains, not the cultivated silence of meditation, but the raw and inescapable absence of all that was ever known. Those who truly fall through the illusion do not return with neatly packaged wisdom. They do not speak of levels, progress, or mastery. They see no self to improve, no world to fix, no mind to transcend. Words become inadequate, and the urge to declare one’s arrival dissipates.

The mind clings to certainties, but what happens when even the witness dissolves? When there is no observer to claim insight, no reference point to anchor meaning? The dissolution is total. It does not comfort; it obliterates. Those who once seemed enlightened are left exposed, scrambling for the remnants of a ground that no longer exists.

This is why many turn back, seeking solace in philosophies, traditions, and spiritual titles. There is safety in keeping one foot on familiar terrain. The true leap leaves nothing to hold onto. Those who cross that final threshold do not emerge with proclamations of awakening. They are not concerned with recognition, nor do they offer roadmaps. They simply are – formless, weightless, ungraspable.

Some may glimpse this abyss and recoil, choosing the dream over the void. Others may step forward and vanish.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation/Neurofeedback, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Unutterable Silence of Awakening

Awakening defies articulation. To attempt to describe it is to attempt to capture the wind in your hands. Words fall short, no matter how poetic, for what unfolds in the direct experience of awakening exists beyond language, beyond thought, beyond even the sense of “I.”

Many speak of awakening with eloquence, detailing radiant visions or profound realizations. Yet, these narratives, however beautiful, point not to the experience itself but to the mind’s interpretation of it. The mind, ever the storyteller, attempts to reduce the infinite into the finite—an impossible task. To truly know awakening is to step into a space where words crumble, where the sense of separation dissolves, and where only silence remains.

Awakening isn’t an event to possess or explain; it is an unravelling. It feels like the collapsing of a boundary you didn’t realize was there. What remains is indescribable, for there is no longer a “you” separate from it to describe it.

This doesn’t mean one cannot share insights or reflect on the shifts that arise after awakening. But those insights are not awakening itself—they are the ripples of an unfathomable stillness. Awakening is not what you think it is; it cannot be. The moment you attach a concept or image to it, you have moved away from its essence.

So, if you’ve managed to neatly define your spiritual awakening, pause. Ask yourself: who is telling this story? Is this the awakening, or is this the ego dressing itself in spiritual robes? Authentic awakening is not something you have—it is something you are. And when the truth of that hits, no words will suffice.

In the wake of awakening, the need to articulate dissolves. Silence becomes the truest expression of the infinite. Perhaps this is why the great sages often spoke so little, allowing their presence to say what words never could.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

Who and What Is Wearing the Ego

You Can Fully Know the Ego, or You Can Fully Know Who and What Is Wearing the Ego

The ego is a master of disguise, shaping itself to fit the roles, masks, and identities that define one’s place in the world. It is the voice narrating our experiences, the architect of our self-concept, and the filter through which we perceive reality. Yet, there comes a moment in every profound spiritual inquiry when the ego’s narrative starts to unravel, and a deeper question arises: Who is wearing the ego?

To fully know the ego is to observe its patterns, trace its motivations, and untangle its many threads. It is a deep and necessary work—this excavation of the self—but it often stops short of true liberation. Why? Because while one might understand the mechanisms of the ego, its fears, desires, and attachments, this understanding still operates within the ego’s domain. It is akin to studying a dream while remaining unaware that one is the dreamer.

The greater mystery lies beyond the ego’s web, in the silent witness observing it all. This witness is not a product of thought, nor is it bound by the limitations of identity. It is pure awareness, the unchanging presence in which the ego arises, performs, and dissolves.

To fully know who or what is wearing the ego requires a radical shift in perspective. It is not about fixing or eradicating the ego but seeing through its illusion altogether. The ego is neither enemy nor ally; it is merely a tool, a temporary garment worn by the ineffable essence of who you truly are.

This inquiry demands a willingness to surrender everything you believe about yourself, even the most cherished notions of spirituality and growth. It calls for courage to rest in the unknown, where no concepts or roles can anchor you. From this space, the ego’s dance loses its grip. The masks fall away, not because they were stripped, but because they were never truly real.

What remains is indescribable—a boundless, formless essence that cannot be confined to the limitations of egoic perception. To recognize this is to shift from being caught in the drama of the ego to embracing the freedom of the witness. This is the difference between living as the role and awakening as the wearer of all roles.

Ultimately, the choice is yours. You can spend a lifetime studying the ego, mapping its terrain, and understanding its dynamics. Or, you can turn inward, past the shadows and reflections, and discover the luminous presence wearing the ego—a presence that has been free all along.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Face of the Observing Self

What does it mean to observe oneself? To truly look inward is to confront the observer and the observed paradox. Self-observation reveals something both unsettling and liberating: the absence of a concrete “self” to observe. Yet, this absence is not a void; it is a vast, dynamic awareness that holds all experience without judgment or attachment.

When the mind turns its gaze inward, it seeks to grasp the essence of identity. Who is the one observing? Is it the body, the thoughts, or the emotions? As the layers of identity dissolve under scrutiny, the “face” of the observing self becomes clear: it has no features, no boundaries, no name. It is an awareness that exists beyond the stories we tell ourselves, beyond the constructs of past and future.

This realization often stirs resistance. The mind, conditioned to identify with roles and narratives, may fight to hold onto the illusion of a solid self. But the observing self invites surrender—not as a defeat but as a return to authenticity. To analyze its face is not to define it but to recognize that it is the source of all definitions, all perceptions, and all experiences.

In this space of pure observation, there is no judgment. Thoughts arise and fall away like waves; emotions flow without resistance. The observer does not interfere, label, or categorize. It is simply present, awake, and unattached. This is where true freedom lies—not in controlling the waves of experience but in abiding by the unmoving awareness beneath them.

The practice of observing oneself is not an escape from life but a profound engagement with it. It is the realization that the one who suffers, the one who desires, and the one who fears is not the ultimate truth of who we are. Beyond these transient identities lies the still, eternal witness, untouched by the flux of existence.

To analyze the face of the observing self is to encounter the formless essence of being. It is a mirror reflecting the infinite, a gateway to profound peace. This realization transforms how we engage with the world, fostering a deep compassion for ourselves and others. For when the illusion of separation falls away, what remains is love—the recognition that the observer and the observed are one.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Self You’ve Disowned

We often approach the idea of God as something external—an omniscient force watching from a distance, a transcendent creator who governs the cosmos. Yet this perspective keeps us trapped in separation, perpetually seeking something outside ourselves to fill a void or grant us salvation. What if the very concept of God points to an aspect of our being, an ultimate reflection of the self we’ve denied?

This disowned self isn’t the egoic identity that clings to its limitations. We have forgotten how to access the essence of boundless awareness, a space of infinite potential and wisdom. To disown something is to exile it from consciousness. And what has been exiled? The unconditioned self is the aspect of us that sees through the illusions of individuality and recognizes its oneness with all existence.

When we strip away the layers of attachment, fear, and identification with form, what remains? The answer is not a void in the nihilistic sense but a fertile emptiness where the fullness of life reveals itself. This is the realm where the divine resides, not as a being separate from you, but as the highest level of yourself—a self too vast, too luminous, to fit into the confines of your limited perception.

The Psychology of Disowning God

Many disown this ultimate self because embracing it requires the dissolution of the ego. We cling to roles, stories, and identities because they provide a sense of control. Yet these constructs are fragile, built on the shifting sands of impermanence. To own the highest self—the God-self—is to release the need for control, to step into the unknown with trust.

This is why the concept of God can evoke discomfort or skepticism. It forces us to confront the parts of ourselves that resist unity. The fragmented mind would rather see divinity as “out there” than face the profound responsibility of embodying it. To own the God-self is to accept that you are both the creator and the created, the ocean and the wave.

Reclaiming the Disowned Self

Reclaiming this aspect of the self is not about achieving something new. It is about remembering. This remembering begins with stillness—a radical turning inward that allows you to see the divine as the very ground of your being. It is the quiet realization that you are not a seeker in search of God; you are God, awakening to itself.

This journey requires profound courage. To reclaim the self you’ve disowned is to face the shadows you’ve avoided, to embrace the paradoxes of existence. It is to see that what you once called “God” and what you once called “self” are not separate, but one.

This realization does not inflate the ego. On the contrary, it dissolves it. When you live from the awareness of the highest self, every action becomes an expression of divine will. Compassion flows naturally because you recognize every being as another facet of the same essence. Suffering transforms into a teacher, guiding you back to wholeness.

Living from the God-Self

To live from this understanding is to inhabit life with clarity and grace. Challenges no longer feel like punishments but invitations to deepen your alignment with the divine within. Relationships are no longer transactional but become mirrors reflecting the infinite back to you. Every moment becomes sacred—not because of what it contains, but because of who you are as you experience it.

This is the ultimate paradox: God is not something you find; it is something you become by realizing you were never anything else.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith

The Ultimate Love

The Force That Transcends All Boundaries

Love’s true essence is beyond comprehension, an omnipresent force so profound it erases the illusion of separation. It moves in dimensions beyond moral constructs, ideology, and identity. When fully realized, this love obliterates the ego and opens the heart so that even the most hardened souls cannot resist its call.

The human mind craves order, labelling people into categories—good, evil, victim, perpetrator. But ultimate love doesn’t comply with these distinctions. It meets each being at the core of their essence, beneath the conditioning and trauma that have shaped their actions. This kind of love can dismantle even the most fortified belief systems.

Imagine the inner world of someone consumed by hatred, caught in the web of fear, anger, and dogma. The walls around their heart seem impenetrable, yet ultimate love does not storm these walls; it dissolves them. It renders resistance futile by revealing what has been buried deep inside—a longing to belong, to be seen, and to be held in a space beyond judgment.

Ultimate love does not negotiate with the mind. It penetrates through the layers of identity, be it the identity of a saint or a sinner, revealing the same radiant essence beneath all masks. It leaves no room for pretense. This love cannot be owned, managed, or bargained with; it simply is.

Consider the most unimaginable scenario—a person shaped by the horrors of hatred, such as a Nazi, encountering the force of unconditional love. It is not a love that justifies or condones but one that sees beyond. That person’s history, belief system, and ideology would crumble under the weight of such grace. All that remains is a naked heart, laid bare in the presence of a force so magnificent it demands surrender. Not as punishment, but as liberation.

This love does not require forgiveness. It transcends it. Forgiveness suggests wrongdoing, but ultimate love offers a view where the need for forgiveness dissolves, revealing the underlying unity where all things are reconciled. When this love is encountered, tears flow not from shame, but from the relief of being released from the prison of the mind’s narratives.

This is the love that brings anyone, no matter how lost, to their knees—not out of fear, but in awe. It’s the moment when everything false melts away, and only the truth remains: the realization that there has never been separation, and love was the ground of all existence all along.

Ultimate love is not just the absence of hate; it is the luminous presence that absorbs even the darkest shadow, rendering it irrelevant. It is the undeniable force that brings every soul back to where it has always belonged—home.

Morgan O. Smith

Yinnergy Meditation, Spiritual Life Coaching & My Book, Bodhi in the Brain…Available Now!

https://linktr.ee/morganosmith